New Year, Same Me, New Perspective
So Happy New Year.....um yea just 10 days late but that's okay, because this year instead of the whole "This is going to be my year finally" attitude I'm switching things up. Along with being much kinder to myself (which means if I miss a deadline it's not the end of the world) I'm focusing more on my perspective & less talking, more doing! Let's be real, life doesn't magically get easier because of the year. Tough times come just as much as good ones it's just so much easier to focus on the tough times than to be present & in love with the good times. We seriously don't give enough attention to all the random good moments that happen daily . So instead of blaming my problems on the year I'm going to just roll with them as they come and more importantly change the way I react & handle these issues. At the end of the day we can't keep from making tough decisions, dealing with self-righteous characters we are forced to face, from judgement of others and all the rest of the no good crap that falls in between. Life is a beautiful struggle and I have come to believe that if you think your going to fail miserably you probably will because that negative self - talk seems to truly seep into our soul and completely becomes our truth. That has to change so that you can really enjoy this short life we are blessed to have. I could seriously go on forever about how powerful our thoughts truly are and those thoughts alone can dictate any outcome of any situation but I will save my obsession with The Secret for another post. In short do yourself a favor and learn some mantras, they can really help you through any circumstance.
Train your mind to see the good in everything. Positivity is a choice. The happiness of your life depends on the quality of your thoughts ~ Marcus Aurelius
I am also into creating a more effective schedule to help set myself up for success to reach my goals. If you want a significant change in your life it's a lot like your fitness goals, you need to put in the work, hard work, even when it's uncomfortable to see real progress! I plan on getting really uncomfortable mentally & physically because this inner nagging voice telling me I can do more, be more is becoming deafening.
I thank the universe for my Dad, & both the most influential women, my Aunt Diane & Grandma, that I have as family to still believe in me the way they do even when my negatives outweigh the positives. I have surrounded myself with quality people, the amount of people you think you know or know you doesn't mean shit. I've learned who my real deal, would show up & hide-the -body-no-questions-asked with me kind of friends and those few but lucky souls know I would never roll on them on any given day! These peeps have gotten me through the toughest years of my life & I appreciate their love & confidence in me so I will continue to grow with them.
For those of you that have suffered financially I feel ya! I have been so focused on bettering my income to provide for my family I've lost sight of my why and the pure happiness my family brings me. I have put the focus on money and not on them. Sure I have a little ways to go with Brooklyn but my boys are reaching those last years that I have any chance of influence or significant time with. Nicolas, my middle son, has already started to drift and it's so exciting when I get time with him. Thank god Ryden, my oldest, my ride or die, will probably never hit that stage because of our unique bond. It's so easy to let them be once they get independent. Once they can run around at the beach safely we stop looking, they are playing quietly in their room we stop searching but this time is precious for this is the time they need us the most. To guide them and love them through all the physical , emotional and mental struggles of adolescence. This past New Years Eve was so different and I loved it. For years it consisted of getting the kids to bed before all the hoopla started from the holiday and praying they would sleep through the drunk neighbor's laughs, fireworks and of course we'd joke how old we are since we are in bed way before the ball dropped. This year Nick invited his 2 best friends over. We decorated, got props from the store and set up to have our own hoopla. The man and I even decided to hang in there with our own celebrations, the kids with kid's wine of course. It was the best way to kick off the New Year! We set off fireworks way into the night, laughed and played with all the kids. They are now at the age when instead of rushing them off to bed to rest ourselves they were co-conspirators. That was the night I realized I let providing for my family trump loving and spending these precious moments I have left with them. Not this year. Loving & raising them are just as an essential part of providing for them just as important as financial.
I hope you will follow me throughout 2019 because I plan to be the change that you truly see. I have so many great ideas for this blog and creating content for you all is what brings me personal joy so that takes priority on the list!
You can't go back and change the beginning, but you can start where you are and change the ending ~ C.S. Lewis